


Your Mournful Tones

by Kate_Reid



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Canon Compliant, Canon Universe, F/M, Gen, Introspection, No Dialogue
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-31
Updated: 2019-05-31
Packaged: 2020-03-31 00:13:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19038421
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kate_Reid/pseuds/Kate_Reid
Summary: At the end of the day, Leia knew damn well where her son’s obstinance came from.  And it wasn’t from his easy-come, easy-go father, though it amused her to see bits of Han in Ben.No, Leia saw the source of Ben’s immovability in her mirror each morning.  And, looking herself in the eye, what could she do but laugh?





	Your Mournful Tones

**Author's Note:**

  * For [WinglessOne](https://archiveofourown.org/users/WinglessOne/gifts).



> This is a birthday gift for one of my very favorite readers, WinglessOne, who is also one of my very favorite authors. She puts an unbelievable amount of thought into her work, which is why it's so fun to chat with her and hash out ideas and plot points. She's one of the kindest people I've encountered in Reylo fandom and is always a pleasure to talk to.
> 
> May all your birthday wishes come true, my dear, and may the universe bring you all the nice things you deserve! 
> 
> Please enjoy this little ficlet as a fellow inhabitant of Kylo Ben's head. Maybe we can split rent? :)

He’s called _”darling”_ over and over.  He’s given a warning, again and again.

Every day, he wakes, gasping, breathless, shaking his head to rid his mind of the images.

She’s always _gone_.  He starts awake on the throne room floor, time after time, and she’s nowhere to be found.  He’s only ever greeted by Hux, with his extremely poorly-masked murderous intent, every single time.

It’s this loss that he decides to dwell on, rather than the warnings.

It’s the warnings that he wants to run from; hide from; slither away from.

He doesn’t shrink from the words that warn him--no; he cowers from the voice that does. 

The voice expresses unconditional love, apology for failure, hope of reconciliation, admonition against false belief, hope for his return, more love, love again, so much love.

It’s the love that spikes his fear.

He hears his mother and he’s suddenly rendered helpless.

  


*******

  


When would her son stop this foolishness and come home?  “Home” was relative, of course. She’d called any manner of places home, and two of them no longer existed on any starmap.  Her call for him to return home was only ever a call for him to return to her, really.

He’d been heartbeats from home.  Just a pulse that beat in the wrist of a man touching his son’s face for the first time in ages--a touch she felt across light-years.  A bright, sharp hope that lasted a split second before the pulse stopped and everything dimmed abruptly, a pain she felt in her heart that nearly drove her to her knees, followed by a helpless desperation she couldn’t hope to grasp.

Hope.  Hope again swelled into the void nearly immediately.   And she felt a fool.

Heartbeats and a touch--a father’s caress to the face of a son thought lost,

If she only had the time to remind her son of her love--her love had never wavered, so time was her only regret.  She was proud of every single one of her accomplishments and wouldn’t trade any one of them for the galaxy. 

But to get back some of her time?  She’d give anything for it--time to shower her beloved son with all of the affection and attention he deserved.  

Leia knew, though, that her regrets and a credit or two would buy her a cup of caf.  She forced herself away from her regrets. She’d given up her pride. Could Ben give up his as well?  

When she sent up her wishes, she didn’t even know where she was directing them; she finally settled on the Force.  Leia only wanted to meet Ben in the middle of a field with nothing between them--her pride cast to one side, Ben’s to the other.

Senseless, all of that pride.  Piled to either side of their meeting, hers towered higher.  That wasn’t a surprise. She knew that the scales of necessary forgiveness weighed far heavier on her side than her son’s, even as she took into account all of Ben’s actions.

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by A-ha's song, "Analogue."
> 
> [Come say hi!](https://linktr.ee/stainlessstyled)


End file.
